Today I read an article “5 Fights Every Couple Should Have” on Yahoo and it made me reflect on my own relationship. 1 year 8 months. That is how long I’ve been in my first serious, adult relationship. No we aren’t engaged, married, have kids, or share finances. However, we do spend A LOT of time together. And what usually happens when a couple spends a lot of time together? They either grow closer or further apart.
I would be lying if I said my relationship was perfect. Arguments have strengthened our bond because:
- It helped establish respect.
- When there is listening and talking involved – it helped us see both sides to the argument and appreciate each other.
- Speaking for myself – it has helped me pinpoint what I SHOULDN’T do, like hold onto things.
There are more ways arguments have benefited my relationship but those are the creme de la creme.
As far as advice goes: “If fights are unavoidable, why not make them as productive as possible?” – Dr. Gilda Carle. My big pet peeve with fights is CONSTANTLY fighting over the SAME issue! It annoys me even more when I am at fault! Ideally, fights should end with a resolution, an agreement, a compromise. There should be some progress made. After all, who wants to be in a regressive relationship?
Closing thoughts: Fights are good as long as there is growth involved because: no couple is perfect, no one person is perfect, everyone makes mistakes (keep in mind: you can only forgive a person so many times before they start taking advantage), and ultimately, if you love your partner and you both are making an effort, don’t stop ’til it’s over!
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